Mini Moments of Yugi and Joey
by HeartOfChaos
Summary: Oneshots/drabbles depicting the wonderful bromance of Yugi and Joey.Rated T for Joey *need I say more?* and because I'm paranoid. I do not own Yugioh.
1. In Which Joey Makes Yugi Face The Music

_This is not my first Yugioh fic, but I deleted all the other ones I had posted on here long ago, because they were absolutely terrible. So here I am, taking at whack at this again, but a different style._

_For those of you familiar with my RENT story, _Mini Moments of Mark and Roger (Volumes 1 and 2), _this is the same basic thing, except with Yugi and Joey (yes I know his real name is Jonouchi, but I'm American, I watched the dubbed series first before I "saw the light" that was true canon, so forgive me, but I still refer to him as Joey…makes my life overall easier). These two have such potential for bromance it just gives me goosebumps thinking about how much fun this is going to be for me._

_Keep in mind, though, that I am a college student. Updates will be sporadic until breaks or (like now) when I really don't wanna do my homework because I have a migraine or I feel I'm gonna throw up._

_I do not, nor do I ever, intend to own Yugioh. While I am borrowing characters and certain situations, I own nothing and make no profit from any of this._

_Reviews are greatly appreciated and encouraged ^_^_

"Joey! Wake up Joey!"

"Aw Mom, c'mon! it's Saturday, it's sleep time."

"I'm not your mother, thank God. Get your ass out of bed or we're going to be late to our own graduation!"

"Graduation, smaduation, who cares? Five more minutes."

"No! Gramps will kill me if I'm late. Get your ass out of bed or I will resort to drastic measures!"

"Yug, c'mon, you resort to drastic measures? You don't have the nerve. Just give me five or ten more minutes of sleep."

"You leave me no other alternative."

"WHAT THE HELL?! GAAAAAAAAAAH!"

"I told you!"

"I didn't think you'd get that freakin drastic on me. What the hell man?! ICE WATER?! WITH ACTUAL CHUNKS OF ICE IN IT?! HOW MUCH DID YOU JUST POUR ON ME, YOU ASS?!

"Now will you get ready?"

"I'm going to kill you!"

"Kill me after the ceremony; I'll be welcoming it by that time."

"I freakin hate you. I used to be able to intimidate you. What happened?"

"Well for one thing, you stopped trying to beat my ass into a bloody pulp on a daily basis."

"You just had to play that card, didn't ya?"

"Just get dressed, Joey."

"Ya know if it were anyone else, say Tristan, they'd be dead right now?"

"Yeah."

"…if I were in you're shoes, I wouldn't wanna go to graduation."

"Why would you say that?"

"C'mon Yugi don't play dumb with me. Tea's flight for New York leaves tomorrow."

"So what does that exactly have to do with today?"

"You made her promise last year that she wouldn't leave for America until after she graduated. You convinced her a high school diploma would make her resume' look better. We all know that you just wanted her to think about it for just a while longer…to stall her. Maybe she'd change her mind if she was here for one more year."

"…So what if that was my motivation?"

"Yug, I'm sorry man, but you gotta face it; she's leaving tomorrow. Not a thing we can do about it, and I don't think there ever was anything we could do about it. This is her dream. We gotta respect that, and we've stalled her enough."

"…I don't want to go to graduation now."

"Well now that you've gotten me awake and thoroughly soaked my bed, I kinda do. So we're going now, and we're going to have fun at this shindig if it's the last thing we do."

"And how is sitting there for hours dwelling on the imminent departure of a good friend going to be fun?"

"Because Tristan and I are bringing a blow up doll and a couple inflatable penises to the ceremony to bounce around while everyone is talking."

"Gotta love the formality and dignity of a graduation ceremony."

_So there you are, Chapter One. It'll get more interesting as it goes, I promise!_


	2. In Which Joey Tries To Cheer Yugi Up

"I can't believe you talked me into this."

"Aw c'mon Yug, it ain't that bad."

"Joey if Gramps finds out about this, I'm dead. Do you hear me? Dead. You want me to die."

"Now if that were the case, I would've let you drown a couple years ago."

"So funny. So incredibly funny."

"Yug, you've had a shit day. The girl of your dreams just got on a plane for New York City, vowing never to return until she makes the big time. So we'll never see her again. You deserve a night out, and you deserve _this_."

"But…this feels so _wrong_."

"That's what most people say their first time at a strip joint. But when Tristan took me here for my birthday a couple months ago…man did my outlook on life change."

"I thought you guys used to come to these places all the time?"

"Correction; we snuck in. We usually had to hide in various places so we wouldn't get caught—they're really anal about minors getting in here, ya know?—so we never really got to get great looks until we came of age and all that jazz."

"How does Mai feel about you coming here with me tonight?"

"She actually suggested it. I know, that's the look I gave her too."

"Wh-why?!"

"Do I look like a guy that would question his girlfriend suggesting he take his friend to a strip club? I didn't ask, I didn't want to jinx anything! So here we are."

"I can't believe I'm here."

"I'm a bit surprised you haven't turned beet red yet."

Silence…

"…Wow…"

"Aha! There's the red I was looking for! How was it?"

"Joey, look behind you."

"Oh, like that's gonna distract me from---MAI WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING HERE?!"

"Can we go back to my place and watch action films and eat a shit load of pizza now?"

"HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN WORKING HERE?!"

"Joey you're making a scene."

"TWO MONTHS?! TWO MONTHS AND YOU DIDN'T THINK TO MENTION IT TO ME BEFORE?! WHAT THE HELL?!"

"Hi, yeah, I'd like to order two pizzas…one pepperoni and extra cheese, the other one with every topping you have minus anchovies, pineapple, and mushrooms. And then I also need six liters of soda…Coca Cola, if you've got it...yeah, Kame Game Shop…Oh hey, I didn't know you worked there Tristan! Where am I, you ask?"

**"GET YOUR HANDS OUT OF MY GIRLFRIEND'S BOOBS, YOU ASSHOLE! I WILL MOP THE FLOOR WITH YOU!"**

"Tristan I'm going to have to call you back, Joey's in the middle of a brawl right now. Yeah, I'll pay you in cash. See you in an hour. "


	3. In Which Yugi Decides To Write A Will

_A quick thank you to the only two people who have reviewed this story: _Una Morgan _and_ consumedbylove, _you are my new favorite human beings on earth! Thank you!_

_And another quick author's note, this is kinda based on something that happened to me while here at college. I overheard my suitemates doing stuff a couple times when I was trying to sleep. NOT FUN! _

_Enjoy, and, as always, feedback is appreciated =]_

"Here we are! Home sweet home!"

"It looks like someone completely trashed the place."

"It's a college dorm room, Yug; of course it's been trashed. Who knows how many parties have been hosted here."

"Who knows how many people have had sex on the carpet."

"Wonderful image. Thanks Yugi."

"You're welcome Joey."

"Ok, which side of the room do you want?"

"That one by the window. I don't want to hear our neighbors if they have any guests. I will not share a wall. Nope. Not happening."

"I'm actually really proud that you plucked up the courage to dorm. I assumed you'd just stay with Gramps during our college years."

"Well I want to get the full college experience."

"Says the kid who won't share a wall with the neighbors."

"I draw the line at trying to sleep while someone's having a party. You're used to it; you shared a wall with that newlywed couple for how long?"

"Ten years, right up until she caught him cheating on her with six other women in their own bed."

"That's just gross."

"Ohhhhh trust me, you don't know gross until you overhear some of the stuff they were saying. Some of it made ME blush, and that's saying something."

"Wow. Okay, so here's my side of the room. There's your side. Where's the fridge going?"

"And they say I'm the one who obsesses over food."

"Shut up. Where is the fridge, anyway?"

"…I thought you had it."

"I thought you got one for graduation."

"No, I thought it was you who got it for graduation."

"Well shit."

"Yeah."

"Wait…crap, it was Tristan who got the fridge."

"…is it too late to request a triple room?"

"Considering the third guy joined the military and left two weeks ago for boot camp? Yeah, I'd say so."

"Okay, so we can do one of two things. We can buy a fridge—"

"With what money, Joey?"

"—or we can go to his house and 'borrow' his fridge. Not like he took it with him or will be using it anytime soon. He'd want us to have it."

"So why don't you call his cell and ask him?"

"Yugi, Tristan is in boot camp. Which means he's learning stuff. Stuff he can use to kick my ass from here to the fucking Shadow Realm. I'm not calling him."

"You just said—"

"We'll tell his mom he sent us over and it was okay with him. Besides, his mother loves me."

"That's true…what am I saying?! Joey we can't steal from Tristan!"

"We're not stealing—we're borrowing. If he freaks we'll give it back the moment he notices. If he notices. Have you noticed how oblivious the guy can be?"

"Gee, like someone else I know?"

"Hey! Just cuz I love you like a brother and I live with you does not mean I won't kick your ass!"

"Ah, but who would buy the food to put in the fridge?"

"…You make a very valid point there, Yugi."

"Yeah. That's what I thought you said."

"Ah, shut up and get in the car. Let's get this over with."

"Hang on, let me grab some paper and pencil. I'm going to write my will on the way, cuz I have a feeling I won't be spared from Tristan's onslaught when he finds out about this."

"Good plan. I'll have you write mine for me while I'm driving."


	4. In Which Yugi Gets Set Up On A Date

"Yugi, put on a nice shirt and grab your coat, we got dates tonight!"

"You always have a date, Joey. You've been with Mai since we got back from Egypt."

"Ah yes, that is true, my height-challenged friend—"

"Do you happen to remember the last time you called me 'height-challenged' Joey? It didn't end well."

"Yeah, yeah, I still got the scar to prove it. That's beside the point. Mai found a nice girl to accompany you on this double date."

"Who'd she set me up with?"

"Does it look like I know? She's not telling me a thing cuz she knows that I'll tell you. I didn't even get to see a picture."

"Why is she setting me up on a blind date?"

"I think its more for your date's benefit. Mai said she'd never been on a date before."

"I know the feeling."

"And I think that's why Mai's putting you two together and then having us escort you."

"I don't need to be escorted!"

"Yugi, how long did it take you to admit to Tea that you loved her and have done so since you were in the first grade?"

"…"

"My point exactly. You are not a smooth operator Yugi. I still don't understand how Tea never figured it out how you felt; you were so obvious it actually hurt me to watch."

"Shut up Joey."

"No seriously, man. I can't tell ya how many times Tristan and I would stand back from you two and plot how to get you two together in order to spare yourself any future humiliation."

"I wasn't that bad."

"You had your good days, I'll give you that."

"Okay, here's the nice shirt, here's the jacket, let's go already."

"Yeah! You won't regret this Yugi! Mai knows this stuff like the back of her hand!"

"That's not reassuring. While you ran into the store to grab ice cream, she and I were talking when she suddenly stopped and screamed at the little set of freckles on the back of her wrist."

"…Okay, let me rephrase. Mai knows this stuff like…like I know food!"

"So it's a sick, twisted, freaky, ESP kind of relationship?"

"This coming from the kid who had a dead Pharoah living in his brain for a few years."

"Shut up."

_Not my best chapter, but it was a little plot bunny that demanded my attention. Needy little beasties._

_Reviews are appreciated, as always. I'll post another chapter today because I'm nice like that. _


	5. In Which Joey Refuses To Go In A Store

_To my fabulous reviewers; you're all getting cookies. Thank you thank you thank you!!!_

_Enjoy the snippet I've cooked up for you. It's a little CRACKish, but it's fun. I was really hyper when I wrote this._

"No."

"C'mon Joey."

"Hell no."

"Joey you're being a baby."

"Hell fucking no."

"Seriously, what's your problem?"

"I'm not doing it. You're not getting me to do this. I have followed you everywhere else, man. From the day after you put that damn puzzle together and things started getting weird, I was behind you all the way, no matter how many times I nearly got my ass killed. You have gotten unwavering loyalty outta me for a long ass time. This…this is where I draw the line."

"This is where you draw the line? Not at Shadow Games, but this? Seriously?"

"I feel that strongly. I'm not going in there. You can go in there, but I'm not going in there with you."

"You might find something you like in there. Health food stores have good food too. They even have cookies that—"

"No. Don't even put 'health food store', 'cookie,' and 'good' in the same sentence, or I will get in my car and leave you here. I'm not going in there with you Yugi. It's not happening."

"We've been eating nothing but ramen for the last month. We need something to cleanse our system of the shit we've put in them."

"Someone's starting to sound like Tea."

"Tea had a few good points. We do eat pretty bad Joey, and if we don't take care of this now, we could end up with…impacted colons, or something. Don't give me that look, I don't know about health stuff. Hence why I'm not majoring in any medically-related field."

"I'd rather die of an impacted colon than eat a veggie burger or whatever uber healthy shit they have in that store. You have fun in there, man; I'm going to Burger World, where they have real food."

"Seriously? You're gonna drive clear across town and leave me here?"

"Yes."

"…You're gonna be the death of me. Let's go."

"There's the Yugi I know and love."

"Give me the keys."

"Sorry man, gotta be this tall to drive this baby."

"C'mon, I'm taking my test next week, give me a little practice here!"

"Not on my car!"

"You're car is the most beat up piece of crap in Domino! What are you worried about?"

"Look, Roxanne—"

"'Roxanne?' Really Joey?"

"Shut up, I'm talking here. She's a fragile soul, Yugi. Only I know the right places to touch her so she doesn't explode on me. You, a foreigner to her wheel, will freak her out with one wrong grip on the wheel and she'll explode before you even turn her on."

"Wow."

"Yeah, so anyways, I—YUGI WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?! GIVE ME BACK MY KEYS YOU LITTLE TWERP!"

"I'M DRIVING YOUR FREAKIN CAR TODAY WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT! I NEED THE PRACTICE!"

"PRACTICE ON TRISTAN'S CAR!"

"IT'S BAD ENOUGH WE STOLE HIS FRIDGE!"

"WE DIDN'T STEAL IT, WE BORROWED IT! GIVE ME BACK MY KEYS YUGI!"

"AFTER I…Joey?"

"GOT YA, YOU LITTLE—Where's my car?"

"There it is, the tow truck just pulled out of the parking lot."

"WHAT?!"

"Joey…you parked right here, didn't you?"

"Yeah. Why?"

"Did you not see the handicapped parking sign?"

"Oh shit."

"Joey."

"Yeah?"

"You're an idiot."

"I know."

"I'm calling Grandpa. He'll give us a ride to the impoundment place so we can get it back. If you suck up enough to him I bet he'll pay the fine too."

"I love Gramps."

"You better. Because after he pays the fines, he's going to make you his slave for the next two months, or however long it takes you to work it off."

"So we'll be working together too?"

"Apparently. But I'll be getting a paycheck."

"That's fine, considering you use that paycheck to buy my food half the time."

_Reviews appreciated ^_^_


	6. In Which Joey Gets Pwned

**BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG!**

"WHAT THE F—"

"What the hell?! It's two thirty!"

**BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG!**

"Joey go answer the door."

"Why me?"

"How well am I going to hold up if it's a legitimate attacker?"

**"JOEY OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR YOU ASSHOLE!"**

"Shit, it's Tristan!"

"I knew it was a bad idea to steal his fridge! But do you ever listen to me? NO!"

"Yug, you distract him while I sneak out the window!"

"But—but—what the fuck am I supposed to do?! And you're out the window already. Well, time to face the music. Hey Tristan, Joey's not—Tristan?"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRGGGGH! LEMME GO YOU ASS! OW!"

"YOU TAUGHT ME THE DECOY TRIP, YOU BASTARD! I KNEW YOU'D PULL THAT TONIGHT, SO I CAME OUT HERE TO CATCH YOU IN THE ACT! **WHERE THE HELL IS MY MINIFRIDGE?!"**

"Tristan! It's in here!"

"Oh hey Yugi, what's up?"

"Nothing much. How was boot camp?"

"Eh, it was alright. I learned some new tricks. I shall demonstrate with our dear Joseph. See Yugi, if you put one hand here and loop one arm around your opponent like this, then do this and…"

"AAAAAAAAARRRRGH! OOF!"

"And voila, your opponent has been flipped over on his back and incapacitated for the moment. Now if you wanna add a little insult to injury, you can do…"

"And I thought I was the weird one for having a pharaoh live in my head for a few years."


	7. In Which Yugi And Joey Write Papers

_I was sitting in an airport for four hours while writing this. I was supposed to be writing papers...that becomes pretty obvious as you read. Hope everyone had a great holiday break! Finals are here for me, therefore I won't be updating till after December 20 =)._

_Thank you to those that have reviewed! It has been much appreciated. _

_Enjoy!_

"'And in conclusion—' No, you can't end closing paragraphs with that. Ummmm… let's see…"

"Yugi, you're talking to yourself again."

"Old habits die hard."

"Well kill the habit just for today, I'm trying to write a paper too."

"What's yours on?"

"Well, I read these two essays on the gender gap between married couples, mostly talking about how no one can communicate right and so it causes divorces. I'm supposed to take a stand and basically write an essay on this subject comparing the other two essays at the same time and...honestly I don't freakin know."

"Who wrote them?"

"These two American writers—"

"There you go, they're American. Talk about how Americans blow everything out of proportion, exaggerate. Lack of communication is not what causes divorces; it's certainly a problem in relationships, but it doesn't cause their destruction."

"I don't freaking know, I just want to write something down that sounds remotely intelligent, and I'm having a hard time using my brain with you yapping to yourself. What's your essay on anyway?"

"Reflective essay for my archaeology class."

"Which one? Aren't you taking, like, twelve?"

"Three, actually. And it's the one with the professor that gave me a D on my midterm."

"Oh right, the asshole. So are you letting him have it in this reflection paper?"

"Nope. But he's not getting a great evaluation from me. Not at all. He shouldn't be a teacher, with his condescending attitude and—"

"Yug? Buddy you're ranting again. Write your paper, and I'll write mine."

"Yeah…so how's that bruised tailbone treating you?"

"Shut up! How long am I gonna be tormented about that?!"

"I told you we shouldn't have taken Tristan's fridge!"

"Well it doesn't matter now, considering he gave it to us after all!"

"He gave it to _me_, not you."

"How come he always beats up on me, but not on you?"

"Because he knows that you usually drag me into your hair-brained schemes."

"As opposed to you dragging us into Shadow Game shit?"

"I was pretty sure I gave you guys plenty of chances to get out of those situations."

"Yeah, but did you honestly think we were gonna let a little half-pint like you save the world single-handedly? You can barely get your bag on your back; I'm pretty sure it weighs more than you do."

"Shut up and write your paper, Joey."


	8. In Which Joey's Boxers Are In Jeopardy

_Sooooo…how many of you hate me? *flinches as she counts the staggering number of hands that just shot up* Well…what can I say? Life happens. Sorry. I still love you all! And here I am once again to bring you entertainment. Enjoy, and I own nothing. I make no profit from any of this (but you wanna know what I DO own? A crap ton of my YuGiOh graphic novels that we just found in my storage unit today…I can't wait till they're unpacked…Momma's coming, my pretties, Momma's coming…)_

"I'm bored."

"Go clean something in the shop then."

"You know just cuz you're my boss doesn't mean you get to boss me around."

"Um, Joey? That's kinda the point of being the boss."

"…you just wait. I'll get promoted to a rank above you someday, and then you'll be sorry."

"We work in my grandfather's shop. The only way you're going to become my boss is buying the shop from Gramps."

"So?"

"So you can't even buy your own food. I buy your food. Another reason why I kinda have a right to boss you around."

"Yeah, well…you're still shorter! There's a reason to show some respect for your elders!"

"You're only five months older than me."

"Five months is five months."

"Okay Joey. Whatever you say."

"…When's Gramps getting back from that expedition in Italy?"

"Next week."

"…you know, we could throw a party here…"

"And then we would DIE. Grandpa would absolutely DESTROY us. That's not even an exaggeration. He would truly kill us."

"He would if he found out."

"Great. Let's throw a party here and then _lie_ about it. Yeah, that sounds like a good plan."

"Well we can't have it at our dorm; it's being fumigated."

"I think I was aware of that."

"You just had to report the termites, didn't you?"

"You heard the inspectors; if I hadn't reported it, the freakin ceiling would've fallen on top of us, along with our neighbor's upstairs! We would've been killed or severely injured!"

"Correction; _you _would've been killed or severely injured."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You are much more fragile than I am."

"Oh really?"

"Yeah. I'm made outta much tougher stuff than you. Not to mention I'm bigger, my bones are thicker…"

"I'm not sure if that would be helpful Joey. If the building were to collapse on top of us, I think I'd have a better chance of survival because I'm smaller. I can wriggle my way out easier."

"Sure Yugi. Whatever helps you sleep at night."

"Actually I have a feeling this is gonna keep me up all night. If I have nightmares about us getting squished by a building tonight I'm dousing your lucky boxers in Bengay."


	9. In Which Yugi Lies Through His Teeth

_So I pretty much went off the deep end. Almost literally. Hence my lengthy absence. Sorry about that. _

_ Enjoy. Reviews are nice. _

"Yug?"

"Yeah?

"You alright?"

"Yeah…"

"Liar. Talk to me."

"Really nothing much else to say."

"Sure there is. Did she say anything else?"

"The wedding is next week. She's…she's eloping to Las Vegas. She doesn't want her mother to know anything until after…after…"

"Gotcha."

"Yeah."

"You okay?"

"I already said I was."

"Yeah, but I'm not taking anything else but honesty at this point."

"Why wouldn't I be fine? The girl I…she's getting married. To some attractive dancer who literally swept her off of her feet. He's apparently tall enough to do that."

"I'm sorry, man."

"Yeah…me too…"


	10. In Which Yugi Hangs Up The Phone

_AUTHOR'S NOTE: PLEASE READ!_

_So…my long absence. There is no excuse for it. Well there is, but that's a long story the likes of which will bore you to tears and then some. I made this super special awesomely long to make up for it (if any of you got that reference, you are my new best friend)_

_This was not the direction I intended going in when I first started writing. I was a bit…troubled (?) and wanted to write something funny, and then this came out. Alllll off this. But I like it. No, like is not a strong enough word. I love it. I'm so incredibly proud of it. I feel like a parent whose kid just graduated from Harvard Medical School at the top of their class._

_I'm going to write a couple more chapters now while I have the plotbunny in my head. I need to freewrite a bit before I work on a paper that's due tomorrow morning. This is not a guarantee that they'll be uploaded right after this one, but know that they'll be at least worked on, that I'm still here, and I still am writing stuff. I haven't forgotten this story._

_As for some moments that could be considered OOC…I'd just like to say that depression and trauma kind of trigger behavior that is out of character for someone. And people do become asses when they move to another place sometimes. So if anyone would like to complain about any OOC moments in their review, be prepared for a rebuttal. A kind one, but one nonetheless._

_I apologize in advance for the liberal use of ellipses (…) in this chapter. They're there to represent the pauses/awkward silences/other such related things. I think it fits. _

_Enjoy._

"Yugi?"

"Go away."

"No. Talk to me, buddy."

"I'm not talking. To anyone. Ever again. I think I'm going to go be a monk. Take a vow of absolute silence."

"That wouldn't work, dude. If its one thing you are, it's vocal."

"What does that mean?"

"You didn't exactly take bullying quietly, you know. Nor any other injustice thrust upon us by the nutjobs we had to face during the major dueling years. You yelled. A lot. You made inspirational and noble speeches. A lot."

"Go. Away."

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"WHY?"

"Well…for one thing, half of the food in that fridge is mine. Secondly, if I've learned anything in the last few years, it's to never leave your friend alone with his brain in situations such as these. Particularly you. I know what's going on in there, and I know you need to let it out eventually. You don't exactly have the best track record of constructive emotional release—"

".Time. It was one damn time, and it was last semester. Almost six months ago. Am I going to have that thrown in my face for the rest of my life?"

"It was one time too many, and you know it. And if you wanna get really technical, it wasn't just that 'one time'. It was a series of 'one times' that led up to it."

"…What do you want me to say?"

"Yugi. I want you to tell me what is going on in that spiky little head of yours. Please?"

"…you know what's going on in there…"

"What…Oh. OH. Oh shit. Anniversary of Atem leaving…God, three years ago…"

"Now combine that with…with Gramps…"

"And with the elopement phone call from Tea'…damn."

"Yeah."

"But that's not all."

"What?"

"I heard you on the phone with someone before I came in. Relax, get that look off your face. I only heard you saying goodbye. Then I came here to…well…this…"

"Oh…yeah…"

"So who was on the phone?"

"…"

"Yugi. Talk. Now. Please, buddy."

"…Tea'"

"WHAT?"  
"I wasn't going to tell you…"

"Why?"

"Because I knew you'd flip."

"Do I not have a reason to be a bit pissed at her? Seriously. She calls eight months ago to tell us she's eloping with some dancer guy she met in New York, and then we don't hear from her again. We tried calling her when Gramps had his heart attack; no answer. We tried again when Gramps…again, no answer. Tried to call her for the funeral: no answer. She could call her mom and tell her to pass on her condolences, but couldn't be bothered to call you, to call any of us. Tristan tried calling her the night you…again, no fucking answer. Didn't even send her messenger-pigeon mom to pass along her concerns and love. Nothing for six months, until now. What did she have to say?"

"She had a baby this morning."

"…What?"

"Tea' had a baby."

"Holy crap."

"Yeah. A boy. She—"

"Little guy's a little early. Is he okay?"

"Yeah, he's fine. His name's Donovan, after this guy's brother that died in a car wreck or something…I kinda don't remember the details…But, Joey-"

"Well…I'm glad the kid's okay."

"…Joey…His middle name is Atem."

"…After eight months…that's what she decides to tell you? On today, of all days. And…God, the timing of that kid…I…Yugi…"

"I asked her why she never called."

"What'd she say?"

"She was too busy with getting ready for the baby and getting an apartment and making sure she'd be able to come back to her dance company when she was ready and setting up a job for her and for her husband. Something along those lines. I…I kinda blanked out after she started speaking for a couple minutes."

"Understandably so. But…to not call us? Even after Gramps? Seriously? He was like her grandfather too."

"I know. I told her that."

"What'd she say?"

"She said she didn't know what to say to that. I lost my temper a bit, I think. I told her all those friendship speeches she used to recite were obviously nothing to her. That we must've never meant anything at all to her, for her to never call us when she knew how badly I—we—were hurting. Then she came back with the kid's middle name."

"What'd you say?"

"That it proves that he was what she must've cared about the whole time. Not us. I backtracked a little bit after that, saying that maybe she had cared about us at one point, but that had changed when she left and found what she really wanted. Joey…Joey I told her I never wanted to hear from her ever again. She cried. She tried…tried talking to me…trying to apologize, but I didn't want to hear it anymore. So I said goodbye one last time and I hung up."

"Yugi—"

"It was rash, it was dumb, it was cruel. But I don't care anymore. It hurts too much to think about her, to know she's…she's…"

"It was rash, I'll give you that one. It wasn't dumb, though. At least, not the way I see it. She didn't just blow us off to go hang out with some girls. She outright ignored us. The Tea' I knew back in high school wouldn't have just called her mom and asked her to pass on her condolences. She would've come down for the funeral and been here for you. People change. It sucks, but it's true."

"I know."

"…Even Seto freakin Kaiba came to the funeral. Asshole that he is, that was really stand-up of him. I can't believe he paid for it, too."

"You do realize part of the reason why he did that was so I'd be a bit more inclined to sell the Game Shop, right?"

"Yeah, I do. But he gave you money for that too. He didn't have to pay for the funeral or for your hospital stuff either. As much as I dislike the guy, he's got…class…and if you ever tell anyone I said that I will kill you without a second's hesitation."

"I know."

"…You feeling any better yet?"

"A little bit."

"Yuge—"

"My brain is kind of mush right now. Shocked mush."

"Okay. I think I'm gonna go to bed."

"Yeah…yeah, me too…"

"Yugi?"

"Yeah?"

"…Nevermind. Get some good sleep tonight, pal. We'll talk more in the morning."

"Okay…Joey?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you."

"Anytime, everytime, for the rest of time, man."

_I was never a Peachshipper. Nor did I ever really ship Joey/Mai. _


	11. In Which Tragedy Strikes

_I'm on a kick apparently. Enjoy._

"Joey."

"Yugi, buddy, I came as soon as I got the voicemail. My English professor kept me after class to talk about—oh who the fuck cares! How is he?"

"I don't know. It's been a couple hours, and I don't know anything. No one's come out to tell me anything. That's a relatively good sign, right? It…it means he's fighting. Right?"

"That's a good way to look at it. He'll be fine. He's a tough old man. This is his, what, fifth heart attack? He bounces back every time like the pro he is."

"He usually bounces back a bit quicker…"

"Dude, if you had five heart attacks, you'd take a bit longer to recover from each one too."

"Where's Tristan?"

"He's parking the car."

"I'm really thankful he's on leave right now. I don't know what I'd do without you guys. Thanks for coming."

"Hey, he's our grandfather too. Of course we'd be here. Gotten ahold of Tea' yet?"

"No, still getting the voicemail. I don't want to leave something like this as a message, you know? I don't think it's very polite."

"Good point. She's probably in rehearsal or something. She'll answer soon, and then she'll come back for a couple days to mother-hen the living crap out of us until all is right with the world. You'll see. Tea' is there in a pinch."

"Yeah."

"Did you get ahold of anyone else? Bakura, Duke, anyone?"

"Yeah, Duke is picking Bakura up. Mokuba is on his way, apparently."

"What?"

"Yeah, that's what I said."

"Alright then…Where the hell is Tristan? It is not that hard to find a parking place, is it?"

"I guess."

"He needs to hurry the hell up and get here; he said he'd bring in the pizza, that I should just go ahead and run in here and meet up with you, check on you, all that good stuff. Asshole is probably eating the whole thing right now as we speak…parking the car, my ass…"

"Mr. Mutou?"

"Yes, that's me. How is my grandfather?"

"…Mr. Mutou, I'm very sorry. We lost him. His heart just couldn't take it anymore. I will go and grab the necessary paperwork for you to fill out. Again, I'm very…very sorry."

"…Oh, Yugi…"

"YUGI! JOEY! I got here as soon as I could; I got stuck behind this old lady who I swear was going—"  
"Grandpa."

"…I missed something, didn't I?"

"Gramps…"

"Oh shit."

"Yugi? Yu-Yugi!"

"GRANDPA!"

"I gotcha, buddy, I gotcha. It's…it's gonna be okay…oh fuck, no it's not…God damn it…"

"No…no no no no no no no no no no no no…"

"I know, buddy. I know."


	12. In Which Joey Is Supposed To Be Comatose

_So…a resounding amount of hits happened earlier. _

_Could I possibly get one or two comments on how you felt? Whether you think this is in character or not? _

_Hate? Love?_

_The silence is killing me._

_Also: None of this is based off a true story that I know of. Just to make that clear. However, I did do my research. So it's pretty accurate, I think. And my puking sound effects suck ass. Sorry about that._

_Enjoy._

"Hey, Tea'. It's Joey. Look, I know you're busy living the glamorous life of a dancer in New York with your new husband, but we gotta talk. It's about Yugi. Seriously, you need to call him and get him to talk to you. Maybe you can talk some sense into him. I'm not even gonna yell at you for not calling before; I've done that enough in these voicemails. He's…being Yugi. He's burying himself in schoolwork and he's not sleeping. I think he got a hold of some Adderall too, because he's been acting weird and he hasn't slept in days. This has gotten out of hand. I've tried talking to him, but he's not hearing me. Tristan's tried instant messaging him; again, not listening. A phone call from you might be what snaps him out of it and slow down. He's gotta be more careful with this, what with family history of heart issues…Just…call…or something. Soon. Please?"

_Sigh._

"Yo Yuge, I'm home! Please tell me there's…Yugi?"

**HUAH! **

"Yugi? You okay buddy?"

**HUAH! BLEH!**

"Ugh…"

"Yugi! Hey, Yugi! You okay in there?"

"Ummm…yeah…?"

"That doesn't sound convincing."

"Joey? What are you doing awake? I thought Marik sent you to the Shadow Realm?"

"What?"

"You lost the duel and you were just lying there and…HUAH!"

"Yugi, I'm coming in."

"But how? You were hurt, and the Pharaoh felt your soul get sucked out of you. Wait…Joey…"

"Here it comes."

"Joey, where's the Pharaoh? I…I can't feel him…And…Joey, someone stole the puzzle! Marik must've stolen the puzzle! We've gotta…we've gotta…"

"Whoa there. You okay?"

""Umm…I'm dizzy…where's the Pharaoh? I'm surprised I can't hear him. He's probably frantic. But the puzzle is gone, so that might be…Oh crap…**BLEH! HUAH!**"

"Yugi…this isn't funny anymore. Cut it out."

"What? I'm not doing anything, which is the problem! We…we gotta…"

"Yugi. How much Adderall did you take today?"

"What?"

"How many pills have you taken today?"

"I…pills? What? I…Joey, my chest feels weird…"

"Shit! Yugi!"

"You…you're supposed to be lying down…how…?"

"I'll explain later. C'mon, I'm talking you to a hospital."

"No! I can't! I've got to save the world! I have to beat Kaiba and Marik! It's my destiny! We gotta get those God Cards!"

"Right after we get you a pre-duel checkup."

**BLEH!**

"C'mon, up you go. We're going to the car."

"We're on an island; there is no car."

"Yugi we're- oh forget it. We're going. We'll find everything else later. We have to get you to a hospital."

"Joey?"

"Yeah?"

"Where's Tea' and Tristan and Marik and Kaiba and Mokuba and Ishizu and my chest feels really weird and my head hurts."

"Yugi, just...just hang in there, okay? I'll explain everything later. Just stay with me, okay?"

"I'll try...I'm getting really sleepy..."

"Well...that whole spotless driving record I had is about to go down the tubes. Only for you, Yugi Mutou. Only for you."


	13. In Which Yugi Was Unconscious

_I'm apparently on a roll with this story. Which is really rather unfortunate, seeing as I have 3 papers I'm supposed to be writing. _

_But this plot bunny won't leave me alone._

_I know it's a sad bunny. _

_The funnier little shots you got earlier in this story will return, I promise!_

_Someday._

_Soon._

_I hope._

_Reviews are GREATLY appreciated._

_Seriously, I practically hug the little things close to my heart and shower them in love and appreciation._

_Note about this chapter: I'm switching things up on y'all. This may or may not happen again. Don't count on it though._

_Enjoy_

"Joey!"

"Tristan? What the—how the hell-?"

"I told my superiors it was a family emergency."

"Dude, I don't know if—"

"I don't care if it falls into the definition or not. We are family. Is he—"

"He's okay. Kinda. Sorta. Not really. If I hadn't gotten back to the apartment when I did—"

"No. Don't go there. Not right now. You got there just in time. You saved his life."

"Don't say it like I'm a hero or something."

"Whatever, I'm not in a mood to fight right now. What's the damage? Is there any damage?"

"They're running a bunch of tests on his…his heart. He's got such a long history of heart issues, you know?"

"Yeah. I know. The question I have is how come _he _didn't know? What the hell was he thinking? Unless—"

"My turn. Don't go there. It was an accident."

"Are you sure about that? He hasn't been the same since Grandpa Mutou died. You know that more than I do, seeing as you live with him."

"That's my point; I live with him. Yugi's brain…it doesn't work that way. We've talked over the last month or so, I told you how he's been dealing with his grief. He bottles it up, buries it and deals with it when he's alone…or when he thinks he's alone. He's been trying to get back into the swing of things with classes, and none of his professors have been very cooperative with him."

"Seriously? What assholes."

"One professor in particular told him that if he wasn't caught up by next week, he was going to give him an F. Yugi does not deal well with F's."

"Oh I know. I remember high school very clearly."

"Yeah…so he hasn't slept in…God, I don't even know if he's slept at all this week. And I overheard some douche in my Biology class talking to his friend about selling some Adderall to 'that short guy with the rainbow spiky hair'. I was going to full-out confront him…I just got off the phone with Tea'—"

"Joey. You don't need to rehash it for me. I heard your voicemail. Hence why I'm here."

"Right….sorry…"

"Don't apologize. It's fine."

"Yeah…My point is though…He wouldn't have tried to…He was just trying to pass his classes… bury himself in his work and try not to let his brain get in the way, I think. He knows he's needed here. Mostly by me. Which is really pathetic, but it's true. But that's beside the point. He just got really carried away. And if he gets through this relatively unscathed, I might kill him.

"Have you called anyone else?"

"I managed to get 'Yugi' and 'hospital' out of my mouth when I called Bakura before I forgot how to talk up until you came. He said 'Say no more, I'm going to track down Duke, Serenity, and Mai, and I'll be there.'"

"Wait…you didn't call Mai?"

"I accidentally hit Bakura on my phone before her."

"Fair enough. She'll understand."

"God help me if she doesn't."

"If she doesn't, she can kiss my ass. And yours."

"…Tristan."

"Yeah?"

"He almost died. He was really close to having a full-blown heart attack."

"…Shit…"

"We almost lost him. Not to a Shadow Game, not to the Leviathan, not to a psycho trying to destroy the world. There would've been no way to get him back..."

"But the important thing to remember is that we _did_ get him back. _You _got him back."

_Silence_

"Joey?"

"Yeah?"

"I think he needs you more than you think."

"…Maybe…"

"Well…if he didn't before, he will now. Who's going to make sure he takes care of himself and doesn't run himself into the ground again?"

"Me. If he so much as touches his laptop I'm going to break the damn thing with my bare hands."

"Okay, that's getting a bit carried away, don't you think?"

"Nope. Not one damn bit."


	14. In Which Yugi Is Conscious

_Could I possibly get more reviews? Please? _

_Enjoy_

"Mmmrf…ow…"

"Well if it ain't Sleeping Beauty. Welcome back to the land of the living."

"What do you…wait, where the…what the hell? Why am I—"

"You overdosed on Adderall. You came very close to kicking the bucket. You are really freakin lucky you're as relatively fine as you are."

"I…overdosed?"

"Yeah. Yeah, you did."

"…Whoa. How…long have I been here? The last thing I remember was getting home after my anthropology class at two yesterday afternoon…"

"I found you about an hour and a half later. You've been here all night. It's ten-thirty. So, by the time I got you here…we've been here eighteen hours."

"'We?'"

"If you thought I was going to go back to the apartment and leave you here, then you're really delusional."

"Have you slept?"

"Adrenaline rush wore off about two hours ago. The nurse set up a cot in the corner and let me take a power nap here, since visiting hours had technically started."

"Joey, you should go home and—"

"Oh no. You seriously aren't about to tell _me _to go to sleep, are you? After all this? After you not sleeping for God only knows how long and overdoing it on the Adderall and coming THIS CLOSE to having a heart attack? You…you've got no room to be talking, man. No room at all."

"…You're right…I'm sorry, Joey…"

"…Yugi…you need to answer my next question honestly. And if I find out you're lying, I will kill you."

"Joey, when have I ever lied to you?"

"If you had asked me this twenty hours ago...I never thought I'd be here wondering if my friend was going to survive a fucking drug overdose…anything is possible at this point."

"…Fair enough, I guess."

"Was this a suicide attempt."

"What? No. No no no no no. This was an accident. I swear on Grandpa. I swear on Atem. This…I didn't mean for this to get so out of hand. I just wanted to get everything done and fast before I lost my scholarships and flunked out of college…I lost the shop, I don't think I could deal with losing this too…"

"Yugi. Buddy. Listen to me. None of that shit is worth your welfare. Do you hear me? Gramps would not want you to drive yourself to this level just to keep yourself in school. Look…I talked to the school last night. You have officially withdrawn from all courses. You're taking the rest of the semester off. So am I. No penalties whatsoever, as per the president of the university. We'll go back in the fall."

"But why did you-?"

"Because someone has to keep an eye on you. And we both need to get jobs in order to make sure we keep up with rent when we're full time students again, but that can wait for a while."

"Joey—"

"The doctors want to keep you here for a couple more days, keep running tests on your heart. They…they think you might've screwed something up in there…they're not sure…considering your family history, they just wanna be sure...But they said when they do release you, that you're going to take it easy for a few days after that. Up to two weeks, depending on how _I _think you're doing. Then we'll go from there."

"…They think I messed up my heart?"

"…Yugi…you were _this close_ to a heart attack. To dying. Do you realize what that means to those of us you still got? Bakura, Duke, Tristan, _me_?"

"…Joey…I'm so sorry—"

"Don't apologize. Just don't ever do this again. If you're hurting—which I know you have been—you've gotta talk to me. Or someone. You can't bottle it up like this and throw yourself almost literally into something else to this point anymore. You might not survive the next round. Don't you fucking do this ever again. Please. I was worried about you before this. Now I'm...God, Yugi you scared the living shit out of me. I might not find you in time, next time. My mind keeps going back to this one nagging thought…what if I hadn't found you when I did? What if I had found you earlier? Or later? If I had decided to stay after class and ask my professor a question—"

"Joey don't do this to yourself."

"Same thing I'm saying to you. Don't do this to yourself. EVER AGAIN. Promise me that you will talk to me when you're feeling down, that you won't bottle everything up inside of you to this point ever again. I'm not the most intelligent person in the world, but I do credit myself on being a good listener."

"…I promise."

"Okay. And if you break this promise, I'm going to slaughter you. Okay?"

"Okay."

"Okay. Now, that aside…how are you feeling? I probably should've asked that earlier…sorry."

"Sore. Tired. Really tired."

"You should go back to sleep. You need the rest, man. Don't argue with me; your eyelids have been drooping for the last few minutes."

"I could say the same to you."

"I'll rest a little easier when I know you are."

"…Okay…I won't argue…"

"Good."

"…Joey?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks."

"Anytime. I'll sneak you some real food when you wake up."

"You are the greatest friend ever."

"I know."


End file.
